Sollai

To Somalia: Aid, Donation & a random act of kindness

2011-07-21T23:15:00.000-07:00

Whatever!!!

2011-02-12T17:27:00.000-08:00

cute video!

just get used to me already!

2011-02-12T08:19:00.000-08:00

have you ever went to a store, bought a pair of shoes that you knew were gonna be uncomfortable every once in a while and really bitchy at a certain time of the month to your feet but seriously wanted to buy them?
keeping in mind that you knew they were gonna annoy your feet, but still you bought them becuase you knew they looked amazing, they flattered you and with all due fairness, they never intended to hurt nor annoy your feet!
i know i did!
so, i dont complain about those shoes, i dont hate myself for having them, i stop wearing them when they annoy me, but after a reasonable time i come back to them, i dont ditch them for a god damn year and never wear them again!
its probably a useless metaphor and you know me and my analogies, never really that easy to connect.. silly me ;p
any way, lets cut to the chase *finally right?* well, i have my impulses, and i have my antics and ticks, i'm a bit anal, rude, messy, loud and... yeah kind of perverted sometimes... but in all true fairness, i am loyal, as loyal as they make them, that of course to my friends, i'm not talking about relationships, because... honestly? in kuwait? who are we kidding!
any way, so when you become friends with me and pass the buffering zone, which has an estimate time of one year to go through, you have no excuse about being friends with me.

lemme paint you the picture here, i am friends with this guy for 5 years, now he is so convinced *from the get go* that i am chronically dramatic, that i always blow things outta perportion..
now i am dramatic, but in certain topics. i do blow things outta perportion.. but only when i really care..
but that doesnt give you an excuse to call me dramatic and insecure when i am in certain positions, when all i need to hear is: fucke, u'll be just fine.

here's what happned and you guys judge: i was seeing someone special for a while, and it was time for me to meet "the gang" and to my shock, the gang is over 15 people...
i got nervous, i had to call my friend and go like... ooh god damn it i am panicking.. blah blah blah!
and get this answer "oooof drama, you're very dramatic, very insecure, i'm with family i'll talk to you later"

wtf? you fuckin kidding me?
now that was shady! that was pure shade honey dearest!
now, we're friends for five years, if i was seriously dramatic all the time, chronicly, 24/7.. then i think its time to stop being my friend, i am pissed, and not seeing him as often, like... i dont insist on seeing him as much as i used to, i dont hate him, i dont dislike him, but i am disappointed.
you say you love me, you say i'm your best friend, but.. you cant tell when i am being just dramatic or seriously worried or panicking?
even if i was dramatic, i felt nervous. so saying you're dramatic and insecure isnt the way to go, bad timing man, you walk me through it then when we done walking you go like.. dude.. u need to fuckin shake it off next time..

wither you're friends with me for five years, or one, if you passed the buffer zone, if you think of me as a real friend and if you honestly value me, then get fuckin used to me and my antics..
if not.. then no need for us to be friends.. you cant complain about me 24/7 and still say you love me and you value me as a friend, you just cant!
so.. either you get used to me already or we need to break it off... :(

Do U Speak Donkey or Cow?

2010-12-08T18:43:00.001-08:00

Ne Me Quitte Pas

2010-12-05T14:55:00.000-08:00

this song is like a close friend... you stay silent but he knows whats going within that head of yours, a french song, was covered by many, its a song written and sung in French by the Belgian chansonnier (singer-songwriter) Jacques Brel in 1959. It has been covered in the original French by many artists and has also been translated into and performed in many other languages.

nina simone, with her androgynous voice, sting with his warm vocals.. they've done it for me..
i thought you guys might like it...

surprisingly, even in english, you can feel the love...

now... this woman, a legend in arabia, covered it too...
Majda El Roumi Ne me quitte pas Olympia 1998 ...

can yall feel it?

Heroes, Thieves & angels with dirty faces

2010-11-22T13:09:00.000-08:00

these are a few lines about heroes, more exactly your hero, the one you come back to when the sky turns gray, about that one individual, who's silence, by itself can cure your vision, heal those wounds, not even leave a scar hidden between the layers of despair, fear, guilt and anger...

its about those thieves, most precisely that innocently dressed thief, who left you without your happiness, your courage, your hopes, most of if not all your dreams, stole the only reminder of a heartbeat you had, the last breathe you were so badly climbing to breath...

and those angels with dirty faces, the ones who got pulled to the dark side, who spend their days and nights drinking, smoking, drowning what ever memory they had of heaven, so they'd be able to make it in that custom designed hell, that echoing voice that gave them their wings, taught them how to fly, then clipped them at the end, rendering them to an eternal fall, trying to forget you're name, trying so hard while being ashamed, they got burned by what they forever preached, forgetting that love can shatter you as easily as it built you up, bury you as fast as it lifted you up...

these are a few lines.. cant be seen or read, only felt and lived... day in and night out...

Gin Wigmore - Hey Ho

2010-11-19T16:48:00.001-08:00

this song was used on weeds finale, now... i had to stop the show and look who the heck is this woman who's bringing me motown exactly how i like it, gin wigmore, a prize winning very young artist who lived in argintina till her father died then moved back to newzeland... amazing!
now here's the link to what i ordered two mints ago, her double platinum cd "Holy Smokes":
Holy Smokes

PS: I POSTED AN MP3 LINK I FOUND ONLINE, SO THEY THREATENED TO DELETE MY BLOG. WONT LINK AGAIN ;)

brit snob

2010-11-17T16:02:00.000-08:00

you're stupid

2010-09-06T17:52:00.000-07:00

this is something that i've written ages ago... i hope yall like it!

im wearing my fav t knocking at your door, you didnt open so i picked the key from under the matt on the floor, went straight to ur room, hit u on ur fuckin leg with a broom, yelling at you that ur stupid making u jump out of your bed, screaming are you crazy!
and with a sick smile i say oo top the mornin to you
and corner you to a seat n since ur scared of me it wasnt very hard 2 do.
now shut up and hear it, i simply cant bare it!
you're stupid, coz you dont think i'm special, your stupid and so superfecial!
i can tell the abc's backwords and when i fuck it up it might give u a laugh then we could blame it on the nazzi bastards!
you're so fuckin stupid that you fuckin cant appreciate it when i eat a large pizza all by myself, i do it out of love coz if you share with me ur ur figure will be thrown away on a shelf!
i dont give a damn about your feelings, if they are not about me, they are pointless!, then they have no meanings!
i want you to talk about me, sing about me, write about me, gossip to your neighbours about me, even if you fuckin shit i want to be about me!
i want you to write my name on your notebook, think of me as the best dancer and the awesomest cook
i want you the work out to impress me, fear that one day you might subress me, spend your god damn day yearning to undress me, your fucking stupid coz your not doing that, cabt you just fuckin do it dont you dare stress me!
i want you to write poems about my toes, compair my nose to a wild rose!
and slap those who compose anything that might appose.
you're fuckin stupid, coz this moll right here is not ur fav cute little thing in this world, coz you dont know that i will never grow old! well no wait i've taken it too far, but i bet you i will never go bold!
let me tell you some thing, YOU ARE STYUPID and most condesending! i cant stand you and all pretenceous shit you would be trending...
i hate you, i hate how everything i see reminds me of you! how i wanna be with you and no body but you, how i keep writing your name on my note book, how i think that you're the awesomest cook.
i hate that i think you look great as a brunet or a blonde, like how i try to impress you every day by dressing like james bond, i hate how i think you'll never grow old, and no i am not taking it too far and i hate how i know you're never go bold..
you're stupid! and i hate how everything you touch turns into gold, i hate how you're always warm and i'm always cold, how you're stories are the greatest tales that has been told!
you're stupid cuz i love you! and u cant see that, so your stupid!
you're stupid! go back to your're sleep, you're stupid, i hope you have the nicest dreams, you're stupid and i hope you wake up and realize that you love me because your stupid and no one in this world would be as stupid as you except me!

From The Vault: Down Boy

2010-09-05T23:30:00.000-07:00

one of my favorite, extremly sexy/sorta dark songs, down boy by the amazingly beautiful australian princess holly valance, the woman who gave you tarkans cover of "kiss kiss", "tuck your shirt in", "naughty girl" and "state of mind", all over played on my ipod.

u sorta have social syphlis

2010-08-27T19:32:00.000-07:00

you know, syphilis isnt a deadly illness now-adays, i mean if its caught early amd well treated! it'll be gone right away and! you leave with a lesson, dont touch a weidrly coloured vag! or a pimply rashy weiner XD
but! social syph is an illness i discovered! i dont know what other people call it! but when someone. lets call her bethany! acts up in such an over processed way, that makes you act out!
see, bathany would be acting all high and mighty in every outing, either she takes the spot or she doesnt talk at all, she would be sitting in a very active group "observing" everyones movement, being silent and seriously judgemental.
bethany always raves about her massive sense of style, even though she doesnt do anything but vest up her outfits, she wears the sma outfit over and over again, still she acts like valentino has designed this outfits strictly for her.
bethany is highly educated... no scratch that, bethany is over educated, she knows things she isnt supposed to know, thus making her be a MAJOR SMART ASS! she never says i dont know, well no no, in all fairness she does, but she says it with the most fucked up things, all the must knows, she doesnt know them, any other random shit, that isnt useful to anyone around her? ooooooh yes she knows all about it!
she really doesnt help you start any conversation, yet she bitches about you not communicating, i used to try to communicate with her, and i used to get bothered when she didnt make an offer, she kept on saying she isnnt a texter, she is a face to face kind of person, but... her face to face is shit... so u get the drift!
now, she studied abroad, so you would think her personal hygene is on an elevated level, but that girl is nasty!
i mean, she has white teeth, but her breath is amazingly ritched! putrid! she has too much hair in area's she should never have hair in! and she refuses to get the hints! well i cant walk straight to her and say bitch! here's a razor! shave em! and here's a mouth wash... gargle!
now, that girl doesnt dine anywhere, oh no sir! she only eats at the redcoated snob infested rests. me? i'm a hotdog and chilli kinda guy, thank u very much, but when i came back home and she was supposed to invite me somewhere nice, she simply suggested the food court "kfc and that shit on that ass!" after i said no to sushi or anything american. i know right? BITCH pleaSe!
ok, so this bitch was introduced to a friend of mine by me, and that bitch lied on my friend to collect dirt.
this bitch, lemme tell you about one instance, she keeps on saying she's straight, when she's a god damn lesbo! she keeps on saying she's bi, when she's a god damn dyke, yall, now i dont know what yall calls it! but back home, if its black like a crow crows like a cry and fucking has FUNGUS in that motherfucking breath like a crow then its a crow bitch! especially when its as hairy as king kong!
she's so hairy, they wrote on that ass "highly flameable" when she popped outta her mama.
she's so god damn hairy, she isnpired that charecter from the grudge!
she is so god damn hairy the use her in chinese fistivals coz that bitch is so damn scary!
lemme tell about this, she has this way of speaking, that only she understands, and she uses shakesperian words, words that arent in use anymore, and she wonders why no one understands her!
she wonders why everyone is suffocated by her, and she doesnt get it! she is socially retarded! she has the social syph!
she is so damn cheap, more than once she was supposed to pick the tap when she and i/other friends were out with her, the whole tap because she was supposed to be generous coz we came back home and she is taking me/us out, she said split! who splits when you invite people to dinner?
lemme tell one thing, if it was me and i invited a friend who was away for 7 months for dinner i would never let my friend pay! thats is shameful!
and she has like triple what we have in our bank accounts.. no no triple that triple! so why is she so cheap?
she sits with me and my friends and she says oh no i aint hungry, then she eats a whole plate, now... bless your heart girl i love a woman with an appetite, that is just sexy, but say that you'll eat so we would get more for you HOE!
now this hoe was friendless you dig? yall! lemme tell you about this, i introduced her to a friend, and she got all hooked in his business like, this bitch, she wanted to see him every god damn day, and my friend was so nice, he saw her allot, and when i came back... she got jelous when i hung out with that friend, demanding to be with us 24/7.
yall, i know its fucked up, but get this yall, i used to take her to see my friends, she would take their numbers and bb pins and add them!
she knew them for what? 44 seconds before?
and when ever i wanna go out with them i invite them first cause they are so busy, she gets pissed that i didnt invite her,,
bitch, why you hitching over for conclusions hoe? what if i was gonna call u a bit later? what if i didnt wanna see u? what if i was planning something nice to you?
FEVER! FE-VER!
i dont know what happened to her when she was a child, maybe she was raised by hairy toads or furry rats, but that is one frikin skanky skank!
social syph is all what i can call it!
that bitch had the nerve to lie on my friend to cellect dirt!
she makes so much promises! and she never makes any of them come true!
and oh! guess what... that hoe did something so shady now, listen to this, she was in a relationship with someone amazing *red marker line on amazing* and she was suffocating him, he wanted to break up with her twice and she said no coz she can fix her self up and that she has potential!
that wonderful amazing man, gave her a chance, and told her, when u eff up its over!
so days passed by and she effed up again!
and when they argued, he told her i need to talk to u face to face, she said no, tell me here, he said no its too important to do it on the fone, and the guy hung up.
4 hours later she called and said "i... i am ending it" the amazing cool awesome guy was shocked! and he was like.. ok! i am at my house now, i will call you in a sec.
she switched off her mobile.
apparently she called a skanky skank like her and that bitch of a skank told her to do that.
FEVER... FE-VER!
social syph! it is dangerous! contageous! BE CAREFUL!

Amazing live performances

2010-08-25T22:00:00.001-07:00

today i was feeling down, i didnt know what was going on with me, so many little things accumelated so i felt down... maybe its jjust a hormonal imbalance! call it whatever you wanna call it but i cant point it out.
as the day went by a song by christina aguilera shuffled, its called "hurt" and it struc a cord.
many songs played after but the most that moved me were the live versions of those songs.
i wanna share em!

now you guys have emailed me wanting some playlist, i need time coz i wont upload anything online, so i am looking for links, lemme finish and i will update you guys, enjoy kids!

Armin Vs. Sophie

2010-08-23T19:53:00.000-07:00

From His Latest Instalment "Mirage":
its armin, one of my all time fav dj's, featuring sophie, an uplifting progressive trance track, maybe not the best ever from both of them, but to be honest i am loving it.. maybe coz sophie is getting me hooked with her bittersweet voice, thanks to "housejunki's" i got the high quality radio edit.
ENJJOY BITCHES!
Buy: Not Giving Up On Love - CDM
DL: Not Giving Up On Love
Ps... The Remixes ARE AWESOME!

Goodnight Moon

2010-08-21T23:11:00.000-07:00

last night i was on the road and i got lost, it was 3 am, fone dead, deserted area, no gas in my tank, no gas station close by, not so much of a light in that damn road, literally no soul whats so ever in miles!
found a gas station an hour later, and gome 3 hours after that, but before i found that gas station this shuffeled on my ipod...

i felt like i was in a stephen king movie...

then she went:

What should I do I'm just a little baby
What if the lights go out and maybe
And then the wind just starts to moan
Outside the door he followed me home

Well goodnight moon
I want the sun
If it's not here soon
I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say
Goodnight moon

There's a shark in the pool
And a witch in the tree
A crazy old neighbour and he's been watching me
And there's footsteps loud and strong coming down the hall
Something's under the bed
Now it's out in the hedge
There's a big black crow sitting on my window ledge
And I hear something scratching through the wall

Oh what should I do I'm just a little baby
What if the lights go out and maybe
I just hate to be all alone
Outside the door he followed me home
Now goodnight moon
I want the sun
If it's not here soon
I might be done
No it won't be too soon 'til I say
Goodnight moon

def one of my all time fav... i got home and i passed out on the floor... with the song on loop on my ipod...
Shivaree - Goodnight Moon
to buy their cd [i just ordered it now]
I Oughtta Give You a Shot in the Head

Alphastates

2010-08-18T21:14:00.000-07:00

this is a wiked song that played on the ABC addictive show "the gates" the show is a desperate housewives meets buffy/The OC.
while clair radcliff and her husband enjoy supernatural hot vampire sex... this song plays and... boy does this band diliver!
Alphastates - Anywhere
to buy their album, go to itunes, or simply buy a hard copy... my prefernce actually.. link into amazon, i have their cd, it has been playing for 2 weeks non-stop now... yall have always emailed me and told me that the music i choose to post here is epic. enjoy!
Human Nature

Comeback

2010-07-22T19:48:00.000-07:00

Random Video by Me

2010-06-06T13:27:00.001-07:00

joseph and i singing a song for a friend

Kelly Rowland's Commander!

2010-04-28T07:04:00.000-07:00

I'll be your Commander!!!!!
i've been waiting for this song for ages!!!!!
The first single from R&B/Dance Diva Kelly Rowland has hit the net. It is entitled "Commander" and is a fantastically produced uptempo record featuring some fire vocals from Miss Kelly. It was produced and written by David Guetta and Rico Love. Kelly has definitely found her niche and this one sounds like a winner. Can't wait to see the music video and hear the rest of her new album.
ust saw it at the blazingswarm.com!
i gotta give 'em props!
Kelly Rowland - Commander

Sara's Bang Bang

2010-04-20T19:21:00.000-07:00

This a song that i really like, its by sara schiralli, its called bang bang
i dont know much about her, all i know is that shes half italian half british, and that she has released her dabut album a while ago...

Sara Schiralli - Bang Bang
i recently bought her album, and its becoming one of my most played, its really great, i really recommend it:
Bang Bang - The Album

Strange kind of feels unguided
like the voice of life went
it went bang bang in my head
and now it's just a little exciting
more than perfect timing
it goes bang bang in my head

And in this moment I'm just a little weak
And in this moment I cannot quite find my feet
And in this moment I could see this day leave me
And in this moment I'm wandering effortlessly
And in this moment I have questions burning
they go bang bang in my head

And so I will not deny this
won't even try and fight it
it goes bang bang in my head
like that, that the fever takes hold
and the peoples hands fold
it goes bang bang in my head

And in this moment I'm just a little weak
And in this moment I cannot quite find my feet
And in this moment I could see this day leave me
And in this moment I'm wandering effortlessly
And in this moment i have questions burning
They go bang bang in my head

mean reds

2010-04-20T15:03:00.001-07:00

i heard it once in breakfast at tiffanys, my favourite movie by the way..
and i believed in it.. its when you are affraid, sad and lonely, with no apparnt causes...
the mean reds are really difficult to deal with, unlike the mean blues, see... the blues can be cured by fixing the problem, but when you dont know whats wrong with you and whats eating you alive... i doubt you can cure it...

i've been in a serious relationship for the past couple of months, it is serious, but long distance, it gives me headache, but its not what worries me at all, neither my exams, they are tiering but i dont really worry about them until 12 hours before the exam itself.

my family are alright, thank god, my friends are ok, i'm secured financially and very much content with it, kind of healthy, i still give my aerobics class every other day... but i wonder what worries me!

now, sometimes i cant sleep, i would stay up all night, tossing and turning, sensing that something is wrong, then i feel a jolt of.. rather emotional pain, which is proof to me that something's wrong, but i just cant point it out, well.. can't until the damage is done.

if i could master this, and focus my energy on it, it might be a good gift, but for the time being it is stressful to either not sleep or get a mini coma when ever the mean reds come...

smoke fades, fog clears up a long while after that feeling had started... then you see the clash with you as a refrence point or a meeting.

it kind of feels like.. kind of like when you have too much coffee, and you are shaken down, with your heart rate high and a strong sense of gravity, pulling nothing but your heart... making that void bigger and bigger.

if there only a way for me to figure out how to deal with this instead of withdrawing...
is it just me? does anyone even feel like that or get those kinds of feeling?
sometimes i think its just the sissy in me over thinking, but honestly, it cant be just that!
the need for clearity is a must sometimes, and until it all clears up, i doubt i'll get a good night sleep...

rope burn

2010-03-14T13:50:00.000-07:00

i knew this song a long time ago, i was 7 ir 8 when it was released?
let's say 10... but recently.. not so long ago... i had a very.. deep experience while it was playing...
i learned so much about my body with it on loop... give it a listen... trust me, i know my shit ;)
Rope Burn

Tie Me Up Mix [Fan Made]

A Live Performance!

- i wish i was in his place!!! -

Here's the lyrics...

Tie me up tie me down

Make me moan real loud

Take off my clothes

No one has to know

Whisperin'

I wanna feel a soft rope burn

Wanna feel a rope burn

When you walked in the room

You knew just what to do

You could have gone from door to door

But you knew just where to go to

Come into my velvet rope

And tell me fantasies

The passion in your voice I wanna hear

As you start to tell me

While you're at it take the blind fold

Tie it gently on me

Don't wanna see but feel the things

You're gonna do to me

One in the mornin'

I'm feelin' so free and sensual

Lyin' here wearin'

Just my imagination for you

Sensation will do

Can you feel the warmth of the

Candlelight embrace your body

I'm feelin' the hot candle wax

Drippin' down the small of my back

sure

2010-03-09T15:39:00.001-08:00

i often compared you to the sweet sweats of my morning coffee mug... sweet... delicate... tender... clear...
i mean.. you're really similar to allot of things... for all i know you could be just a drop of poison injected in me... causing me to knock on the doors of delirium...
i always clip my nails to never damage that... sheer layer of skin you have...
i get in bed minutes earlier... to warm it up for you...
i talk about how many kids we want to have, but secretly i kind of know how much, what sex, which school they go to and how many languages they speak...
true, sometimes i think of myself as the definition of crazy... because honestly... we don't add up, we're like... two pairs of socks switched up, I'm red you're blue, i cant sing but no not you....
i remember when i first knew...
you had a jog in the morning... got on your bike and got me fresh juice...
then you came in... dropped your cloths on the floor...
the day ended.. you slept on the couch... i picked up your cloths and without noticing... i smelled them....
how i knew you say? well... that smell... was my favourite smell... well that is my favorite smell...
you hog the covers of our bed...
i don't like how you keep the tooth paste cap off... it really irritates me when you re-use a coffee filter... and oh... seriously! why do you keep on playing with the neighbours dog?
it reeks of filth...
but... you know when i was sure sure?
you know when i was exactly sure?
when i crumbled... fell down...
and got picked by you...
you took me to the bathroom... ran the water... lit on all the candles... breathed me in... inhaled all i could ever become...
then... all i heard that you were sure...

not kinda sure... but really sure... from the moment you met me...

eaten alive!

2010-03-06T09:22:00.000-08:00

it was a strange feeling... i kept waking up at night, short of breath...
i was suffocating, burning up, it felt as if my organs and my insides were boiling...
everything was dark.. seriously damp, there was just no air...
a lump in my throat, buzzing in my ears, rush of flashbacks popping in my head...
and there it was, expanding, killing me by eating me up, just like a flesh eating virus...
it was a hole in my heart, i dont know where it came from, the night before i was fine, and in that perticular night, i just lost it...
i freaked out, i called all my friends but it was too late most of them had their phones off, some told me the next night had it on silent...
i dont know what came over me...
i sat on the floor and i gathered whats happening to me, i thought about it, and as i put the small, small fractures of whats going on... i opened more room for this hole to consume...
little things just joined forces, little things just made a chock hold on my neck and a black hole in my heart...

i felt hatred... anger...depression.. lonlyness, bitterness for sure!
i also felt scared, sad, mocked and rediculed!
and if you ask me thats a whole lottsa feelings now!
i didnt know whats wrong with me, but the only thing i could think of was the little... little things...

the eating breakfast alone, the backstabbing individuals i've known, the momentalrily phases of the illusion of happiness...
the users, the molesters, the theives, people who you trat with grace and generousity and all you get back from them is filth...
i was pissed...

i dont know what to say... all i know is i really lost hope in many people, and perhaps myself...
i need time to work on this or its gonna eat me alive!

HeartBeatLove!

2010-02-20T03:55:00.000-08:00

Miss Jackson U R NASTY!
the new janet jackson song leaked by darkchiled, although we janet fans had our differences with that guy, but daymn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the song is massive!
with mr.305 pitbull, janet is exploring a new vibe!
here's the song i wont put you off longer!
HeartbeatLove [Ft. Pitbull]- Janet Jackson

Much love for mochiii for calling me internationally and make me heart it fully!
all i heard was snippets that day before!

My Jams This Week

2010-01-28T14:45:00.000-08:00

i dont know why i am getting addicted to a couple of songs this week...
here's the songs that i like, i hope you guys back me up with them:

Natalia Kills - Zombie
she is everything rihanna is dying to be on rated r, personally this song is on loop on my ipod!

Angels Cry - Ft. Ne-Yo
i just love a power ballad, especially when mariah's vocals are used.

Lentil
this song is called lentil! now, her soaring vocals is a deep proof that she's been through what she's singing about!

Blah Blah Blah
Ke$ha Ft. 3OH!3, this girl is so bad ass, i am also in love with her songs take it off and backstabber, ooh and her name is ke-sha, not keesha!

Oooh and by the way, i found these links online, i did not upload them and i do not own anything regarding them, so if the companies wanna take the links down, its their choice, and this is for promo purpouses only :)

how to get ready for a date? "men"

2010-01-23T16:31:00.000-08:00

ok boys, we've all been there, there is nothing to be ashamed of, sometimes going on a date can be extremly stressful, no matter how hot or cute you are...
so here's the pointers you need to follow after you ask the lady out on a date:

Be a gentleman: open the door, stand up when she leaves the table, pay for coffee/food, take her hand when she is decending a ladder or a sidewalk, do not raise your voice, never embaress her, be civil and show that you are a real man.

Dress to Impress: wearing your worn out shorts and your spotted shirt may be the normal thing to do when you're picking up the dry cleans or when your walking your dog, but it is not acceptable on a date that you are really looking forward to, a casual wear can be very nice too if the date wasnt so dress coded if you know what i mean, keep in mind also that its not what your wearing it is the way you wear it so.. be confident and work it!

Shave... I mean SHAVE!: if your back/neck hair maybe exposed from what your wearing, shave it, better yet wax it, it is utterly discusting when you have filthy back hair or neck hair, also, your ears... yes you heard me, your ears and nose! trim 'em down guys! but stay away from your chest hair, women like it, it affirms that you are a man to them... facial hair is a matter of choice, if you look like prince charming without it, then shave, but if you look like shaved cat... i think you should keep it, sometimes a dirty look is very handsome on a man, i like it on me so i always go with it.

your breathe: minty fresh is never a mess, careful about your breathe gentlemen, brush your teeth and floss, mouth wash, rinse and repeat ooh baby you'll be neat! a trick i learned ages ago is to use an apple, eat an apple before your date and your breathe will be inviting for the next 4 hours... trust me on this, been on enough dates to master a trick or two!

topics: stay away from religeon, politics and whatever hot topics your regeon has, no need to talk about palastine and may u just say zip it when it comes to your political beleifs, maybe be give your view in one word, like "i'm a democrate, liberal or whatever" but seriously man, it is either a conflict springer or a yawner! and we all know what religeon does in a date... so i'll keep away from that eh?

Don't be a radio/Don't Be a Shrink: now women are drawn to a good listener, but really annoyed with a shrink, most women have shrinks so there is no need for a shrink who wants to do them, and oh i don't need to stress on the don't be a radio deal, we all hate the none stop talkers, even when we are none stop talkers.

bodily functions and ticks: wont talk much here, dont fart or purb, dont pick your nose nore your ear, dont push the food on your fork with your fingers, dont eat of her plate and never NEVER! use the bathroom and not wash your hands... some women just know... they just do.

final advice: be yourself, be a gentelman, dont cup a feel, dont stress a good night french, a good night smile or a handshake is ok!, if she leans in thats another story and for my friends who are outside the arab world, if you do what i told you... heavy chance you might get lucky ;)

update me if you try it! ladies... your turn is coming ;p

parental issues

2010-01-22T09:10:00.000-08:00

i dont get, why do people get married and have kids if they are going to fuck them up?

it feels like as if the parents moral goal in life is to see how many complexes can they inflect on their children.

all they do is critisize, bitch and whine...

your shorts are too short, your hair is too blown, your too skinny, your too hyper, your too sophisticated that you look like a show off, you dont have a heart, your careless, your have no morals, you have no values, what kind of a man are you?, why do you like music so much? why do you have posters in your room? why do you have iron patons? - i use it for self defence class, get off my ass! - why do you read so much?

omg!

they dont quit!

yesterday i was sitting with my father, and we got into discussing college, i stated my favorite subject and i lightly complained about a professor, all i know is i was talking one minute and the other i was blindsided by my father screaming at me telling me i am the only person who complains about college and all his friends' kids are flying A students...

i was just shocked, i complained about one professor! i have 12 professors who teach me 7 subjects... 11 out of 12 isnt such a bad percentage, we all face difficulties in college thats no big deal..

i decided to shut it, zip it and ignore it!

now, since i've came back to kuwait for my vacation... i did not stay away from the house, i kept put and i stuck to my ground, didnt party didnt go on smoking meetings, i kust went for a quick dinner or lunch and came back home to read books and listen to music, soak up my home and refresh myself, yesterday though my friends, firasr, naser and tareq, told me it would be nice if we had a cigirink, so i bought a pack of marlboro lights and set my way off to 360, we did that... and we talked for about 7 hours since i havent seen them in 4 months.

i came home at 5 in the morning which was a typical thing to do if i was on a vacation and nothing to do, and the moment i walked in all i saw was daddy man huffin and puffin at me being careless with no perpous in life and no aim...

helllllll to the no!
and then he was all like why do you have too many friends and why do you have too many people in your life!
again people, a helll to the a no!!!!

personally, i was such an angel for a week and i got the devil out - kind of! - for one night, i am 20 years old, i am a dental med student and heck all your siblings wish they had kids like me!!

regardless, parents keep on picking about everything, they think they know everything!
and yes i know that we are all kindsa nasty too but man, enough is enough sometimes!

i decided to take a vow of silence... but i kinda cant do it now, you know coz i wanna have fun with my vacation :p, but mind you sir i will take it soon! and all hell will break loss!
well not neccesseraly but eh! who cares ;p

any way, thanks for letting me vent! and oh people who are emailing me from cairo, i'm back in kuwait for a while, kisses!

Anouk - Lost

2010-01-13T08:49:00.000-08:00

Anouk Teeuwe (born April 8, 1975) is a Dutch singer, professionally known as Anouk, born on April 8, 1975, in The Hague, Netherlands.

Anouk's interest in music began because her mother was a blues singer. Anouk initially sang at weddings and parties with the band Shotgun Wedding, a coupla things happened, now bada bing bada boom, the world was introduced to her.

now, i was introduced to anouk about a two years ago, when someone very close to my heart emailed me a very sad goodbye, having to migrate to the states to start a real life and do what she always dreamed of.

the song is now very well known to me, just like a part of my lifes' anatomy, you can sesne how geniunly anouk is taking a ride on this emotional rollercoaster, with her long sighs, shouts and high notes...

this is why i beleive in music, this is why i get tangled up with melodic lyrics and rhythmic beats...

I Found this link for the song, and this is the cd quality version, but i appreciate the live version more:
Anouk - Lost
To Buy Her CD "Hotel New York":
Hotel New York

Gossip

2010-01-12T13:12:00.000-08:00

- i taked about this before, but today there's another twist -

its what you do when you're with your friends, when you're with your family, doctor, neighbour...
its what you do with almost.. Almost everyone...
as flawed humans we tend to love talking about other, throwing your casual insult, your typical ditch and your not so slippery freudian slip.
but... we tend to morph into raging bitchs when anyone says somthing about us.

i wont be so self richeous and sit her talking about how i dont gossip, because i fucking gossip like a depressed houseife who's cheating on her husband with the schools' celibacy club president who's about fifteen years old younger than her.

but you see, i have certain guide rules, i mean i dont gossip your misory, i just... transfer your news into another mutual friend, and in mutual friend i mean a real friend who we have in common, not some crazy assed mother fucker who works in dental cafeteria whom you pass by every day ever so politly and buy your coffee.

moving on, i'm an easy target for gossip, thats why my hair is too huge LOL, any way, so people gossip about me, which is normal and we wont talk about that, but when people gossip with me about other... well... here's an issue!

i never really cared much about the girl with the snaggle tooth if she's getting more action than the whole class, i mean there isnt any law against snagle teeth, plus the guys in my uni would dive head first in any invagination, even if its a cows booty chopped and hung...

i never really cared for "x"'s girlfriend and seriously, the bit about her being gassy while they made out after eating mcdonalds is not a brighter addition intelectual knowledge.

one piece of good gossip is about professor hedaya and how she was cuaght feeling up a girls breast... i always thought she was a dyke... it was really nice to talk shit about her!

i know allot of secrets, and i never share them, when ever i'm told a secret it goes away and fades, like like it was never told, so gossiping secrets is not really something i enjoy...

and to be frank gossiping always puts people in trouble, so i tend to preferf open chat circles with my friends, i mean why talk about it behind the person if the person himself can tell us and we can publicly humiliate/support/DEEEEPLY HUMILIATE him?

one more last thing...
we had a guy at our college, who calls him self "the hose" well, the hose always talks shit about me, and i never bothered, but today a friend whom "the hose" wanted to screw for the longest time told me that when he saw her cleavage, his hose... kinda died :D
and its not really a hose its a long... stick, like a really long pencile!

poor hose guy!
and i hope i dont get my ass kicked tomorrow in class ;p!
ps: yall we gotta submit ower paper sheets for the crown research!!! dont tell me you didnt get this coz yall RSS to my posts!

Sleep - Halogen Remix

2010-01-08T05:24:00.000-08:00

this song, sleep, is a B-side for the amazing band, garbage, sleep is a b-side for the single "Only Happy When It Rains"
this song is so mody, and the remix is modier!
it felt so great to listen to it at 4 am with it being 2c bellow zero with a nice spliff...
this song is awesome!
here you have the halogen remix ft. insomnia

Sleep [Halogen Remix][Ft. Insomnia]

community center

2010-01-07T08:55:00.000-08:00

i told you guys that i am using someone, and that i am angry, plus that i'm betraying allot of my beliefs... well lets talk about it.
-ps: not sugar coating anything or over writing, just gonna post facts -

now the person i am using is "lutfi andabouri", he is a 39 yo man who works at the community center in little Cairo...

met him in a friends gathering after the film festival to watch certain un edited movies that didn't make it into the cut.

i commented on a scene in a movie where the guy steals for his mother, lutfi says that's very common at his work place.

i asked him what he does, he explained that he is the head of the rehab facility, i asked to intern and he said yes. and he added for free of course.

worked there for a week, saw many cases, mother who prostitutes, raped girls: by strangers, reliteves and mostly fathers, abused kids: mentally, sexually and physically, kids who go abandoned in deserts, in front of prayer places and blind children who were thrown in a ditch for a couple of days alone and hungry.

this center holds about 400 cases, there is about 20 center in the capital, none-official and official.

i used those people to feel better with myself, i thought if i helped them i would feel comfort, but i was wrong, each case i saw filled me with hatred and rage, I've become very sick and angry, and after one week i walked out in them.

i am angry at myself, i am depressed, i am sick and tiered of this bullshit and the state of mind people are in.

my finals have been delayed so i have to study, i need to put this on hold...
i can't even put a sentence together, i am so speechless... its taking a toll on me.

new agenda

2010-01-04T04:49:00.001-08:00

haavent posted anything, i have many things to say, i will finish my final tonight and tell you all about it.

i'm using someone, i'm betraying allot of my beleifs... so i need to tell yall bout it

Mash Up

2009-12-29T02:29:00.000-08:00

United State of Pop (Blame It on the Pop)
This is a mashaup thats been floating online for a while, people seemed to like it and asked for it to be posted, it doesnt do much for me though ;(

United State of Pop (Blame It on the Pop)

crazy obssesed freak much?... #9

2009-12-27T08:58:00.000-08:00

have you ever met someone and he or she is all up your business?
wanting to know everything about you, giving you all their time, worrying about yoy, talking 24 hours a day to you?
showing you all the intrests in the world?
and when you get intrested in them too, they become crazy obsessive and seriously moody if you didnt call or talk to them?
they catch a case and start really flippin'...
i talk to this person on bb messenger, and we seem to have hit it of, we spoke for about 2 months i think?
daily messages and hours of conversations... we like the same movies the same music... kind of have much in common...
once i went to a party, and i told him i missed someone, i'm currently in a relationship so we often spoke about it, and really i missed that girl like crazy, and even though there was 40 people in this party, i didnt wanna hang with anyone, it was a nice private pool xmass party...
the music was a selection of my favourite house mixes, the food and the drinks were great...
i just missed that girl, so i told him that and he's like stop this crap and go enjoy the party
so i stayed up at the party for over 12 hours - it was a long ass party! - and i kinda left early coz i dont like to party more than 5 hours, my phone died so i didnt recharge it when i got home and i slept, i woke up around 5 pm, and recharged it, then i find a couple of bbm's from him:
1)hi
2)hello
3)shfeek - whats wrong? -
4) are you ok?
5) i'm worried, bbm me!
when i saw it i i immediatly bbmed and talked to him, all he did was give me attitude and say/hint that its billshit.
i told him i didnt even talk to my mom - who also smsed - yet, so i'm serious my phone died!
he sends me an ok, then deletes me off of bbm, removes me from all contact and disappear.

crazy much?
i means seriously, how retarded one could be at this age? when you 27 ur suppost to grow up and be all sane and centered!

i told my friend who hosted the party and the moment i was done he busrted into luaghter saying "only the freaks u know baby s! only the freak u know!!!"
is it true?
i dont get it! i honestly need help with this!

Like A Star

2009-12-27T03:59:00.000-08:00

Just Like A Star Across My Sky...
Just Like An Angel Of The Page...
Just Like A song In My Heart...
Just Like Oil On My Hands...

Corinne Bailey Rae (born Corinne Jacqueline Bailey on 26 February 1979) is an English singer-songwriter and guitarist who released her debut album Corinne Bailey Rae in February 2006. Rae was named the number-one predicted breakthrough act of 2006 in an annual BBC poll of music critics, Sound of 2006, She became only the fourth female British act in history to have her first album debut at number one.[citation needed] Rae was nominated for Grammy Awards and BRIT Awards, and has won two MOBO Awards and an Album Of The Year Grammy for her work as an featured artist in Herbie Hancock's River: The Joni Letters. Rae was married to fellow musician, Jason Rae from 2001 until his death in 2008. Rae will release her second album,The Sea on February 2, 2010, after a hiatus of two years. The new album is produced by the duo Steve Brown and Steve Chrisanthou, who produced her debut in 2006...

her voice is just enchanted.... and it most certainly will take you places, i remembered her today when i woke up... i had a shower and a bottle of baby oil fell on my hands... i started staring at the oil and then out of the blue i was singing corinne's song...

Like A Star... this song is absolutely amazing!
and her whole album is breath taking... i simply cant wait for her next effort...
she is a genius!

Like A Star
to BUY her album:
Corinne Bailey Rae

Sorry/Merry Xmass/The Shit!

2009-12-25T03:33:00.000-08:00

sorry i havent been posting you guys, i had so many mid-terms!

jesus moses allah god mohammad! they were plenty!

i was on overdirve and redbull overdose!

i was like a severe adhd with too much carb input! - remind me to tell you about some i dated who had adhd! -, any way i'mma post some stuff now :d!

-----------------

Merry Xmass Yallllllll!!!

gonna be having xmass dinner at DJ friend ahmed... siging xmass carols and teasing our guests with a preview of the remixes we made for the "absolute" new years party hosted by Absolute vodka, info is hooked here later!

----------------

Now for the main topic.... THE SHIT! *SNAP SNAP*

so, i dont really go all high maintenance on my ass, i mean i wake up, get whatever's clean on the shelf, wear it, and leave the house...

i over shower and over brush my teeth though, i'm super clean but i dont bleach, tweese, pluck and shave 24 hours a day... i shave once a week and thats it!

but if i have finals i tend to let go of my beard... let ot go in alllll directions possible, but i still look decent... i mean... you know johny dep when he's all beardy and scary like, you can see traces of good looks down there eh?

ohhh fuck off, i can see u smirking abou the johny depp thing, i can look better than him, i mean... with the right look and all... i guess... i hope :S

any way!!

so i went to the oral histology lab and mind you, its officially begings at 12:25 pm, but the doctors dont come until 1:00 pm, it has been like that for the past 5 weeks, so we all get in in about 12:55 or 50....

so this week, the head doctor, the teacher's assistant is what they call this kind of person in the "biz"! was giving the lecture instead of the other female doc who always gives the class, so he began at 12:45...
i arrived at 12:55 exactly, i knocked and came in, i requested an entry, he said "your here now? did you want us to wait for your *highness*?" then he continued adressing the class.

i sucked it up coz god knows if i didnt i would bring this shit down on lil' miss thang over there, so i requested to go in again, and i explained that this class always starts at 1 pm, he jumped all up in my business and said "its not my problem i start at 12:45, now its 1 pm" then he went back adressing the class.

i was like HELL TO THE NO!

now i had a run in with that piece of shit before, last year, i was sitting at the back of the class coz i was downing too many stingers the night before, so... u guys know the drill!
so he was asking the student up in the front row about something and then he asked me, i said i didnt know and he said "you know you think your too good looking and that the world revolves around your hair, just becuase you think your hot that doesnt mean you are"...

i didnt answer i gave him a dirty look, he git all purple and green, the student looked at him with disgrace some luaghed and giggled at him, a kid mummbled "what does his looks have to do with the class"

i starred him down.
i didnt say a word, and i thought about it.
you are commenting on my looks and telling me i look ugly?
you're a 300 pounds, triple chinned, truck tire lipped enlarged todler, your nose is extremly suitable to become an air plane landing slide, it wont be a hard task braiding your nose hair since its longer than your own over gelled wet hair, i think i heard the echo of a couple of kids from your jumbo ears, i hope no one is lost in there, you have 7 boobs, each boob has a baby boob of its own, for all i'm concerned you might be a serial killer who hides his victims between the folds of his skin, and you are telling me i am ugly?
bitch please!
you are 300 pounds of genetically modefied crap!
extra body, extra volume and extra smell BABY!

just becuase i didnt answer you academic question that doesnt give you the right to comment on me socially... that is not your business!

now that piece of shit didn't comment or look me in the eye again, but damn is he waiting for me to slip!

over questioning and putting his nose in almost everything!
wtf? get a life cunt, don't mooch over ours!
and you know whats the stinger in this whole extravaganza?
he thinks he's hot!
i wont go on with this, you think about it!

Medina - You & I

2009-12-18T15:32:00.000-08:00

Medina (born Andrea Fuentealba Valbak; November 3, 1982 in Aarhus, Denmark) is a Danish-Chilean dance, R&B and hip hop singer and songwriter, she has this amazing song that is on my mind for the past 3 weeks, heard first in a club in cairo with Ellyana DeGrassi - hate ur guts bitch ;p - and i can not! get it outta my head!

i bought the cd, which has a limited edtion version that contains this single...
you oughtta buy the cd and check it out yourself!
to hear the song, check out the link here, a blogger friend send me this link yesterday:

Medina - You & I
And check out the video:

Artist Introduction: Esthero

2009-12-16T12:32:00.000-08:00

ok so i thought i would introduce you to some of my favourite artists, so lets begin with esthero... one of my all time fav gals!

this is off of wikipedia: Esthero (born Jenny-Bea Englishman, December 23, 1978 in Stratford, Ontario) is a Canadian singer-songwriter who currently lives in Los Angeles, California. The name Esthero, pronounced [ɛsˈtɛroʊ] es-TAIR-oh, refers both to the singer and formerly to the two-person team of herself and producer Doc. She claims to have got the name by combining the name of the heroine (Esther) and last line ("If I am to be the hero, then I cannot fly from darkness.") of the movie from Sylvia Plath's novel, 'The Bell Jar'.

Esthero's sound characteristically features her voice over a mix of mellow bass lines, jazzy trumpets, Spanish guitar and hip-hop. She is sometimes compared to artists Björk, Portishead and Sade. Later artists who count Esthero among their influences include Res, Fergie and fellow Canadian Nelly Furtado.

Esthero's brother, Jason Englishman, is also a musician.

now the reason i love esthero is: she is so deep, with vocals that will go straight to your core, i was blown off by how talented she is, with songs like, heaven sent, i dirve alone, windmills of your mind, lounge, superheroes, wikked lil' girls and O.G Bitch... esthero really raised the bar for me...

now i want to post all live video's so you'd understand my state of mind and why i am In Love With Her!

now a couple of studio versions :D

And Her Mater Pieces!!!

Anal Much?

2009-12-12T15:20:00.000-08:00

why is everyone emailing about how to have anal sex with indian chicks?
i dont get it, what do i look like?
see i dont do indian chick!
with all do respect, indian women are beautiful the have this mystique look and exotic features and the long hard to resist hair...
but anal oh la bumbai is seriously not my thing.
i never saw the appeal in curry fudge...

nor i'm into any extra spiced up fudge, you see fugde is not whats on my top list...
and the guys at school BBM me or IM thinking i'm some kind of samantha anal hot line!
i swear if i get one more sms about how to do anal without the chocolate surprises i will stuff my throat with over used panties for an obese belly dancing arabian princess panties, one with extra addtional glitter!

i'm tiered of saying "tell her to use an enema" you know how creepy that sounds when someone over hears you?

once a guy called naif told me he didnt know if that spot on his sex hypo was a moll or a dodo!

a dodo?
disgusting!

and then he started to tell me how it looked like a lentil!
maaaan!!
why do you have to ruin my day and a very popular seed!

the horror!
you, i can't believe this, but i wish i would go back to the social nobody who kept to himself and listen to his ipod, all this bullshit started when i walked into blue ribbon with that slut who just wanted free drinks...

i wish i kept to myself!

you know what, i'mma says this once and for all!
use an enema, go slow, lube lube lube, anal go with condoms, NO VASELINE!, and some hannah montana music!

now BITE ME!

Cover Songs

2009-12-10T13:39:00.000-08:00

A cover song is a song performed by someone else besides the original artist, it doesnt necesseraly mean its better than the original, but sometimes It's HELLA GOOD!

now, my favorite cover songs are usually by lily allen and garbage - bow to the rockness -, sia does and amazing job on "I Go To Sleep" posted earlier, and paramores redhead queen.

john lennon, oasis, no doubt, garbage, lily allen, squeeze, sting, the clash, britney, michael and many many others are performers who's songs were covered, shows like glee are famous for doing it, but its either hit or mess, never in between, they did a great job in defying gravity and don't stop believing - which i dont like much, i personally perferf mercy and rehab -, but they did an awful job on many songs, one being one of my ultimate favs "smile - lily allen".

here's a couple of covered songs, listen to them and see if you like the original more.
If You Like Them, Be Sure to purchase:
1-Eva Cassidy's CD'S
2-Punk Goes... CD's
3-Oasis, lily allen, garbage, Sia CD's because i can't get enough of them!

sia - gimme more
http://www.4shared.com/get/106823897/65dd80d8/Sia_-_Gimme_Gimme_More.html

marie digby - umberella
www.mediafire.com/?sbhin3gkycy

lily allen - dont get me wrong
www.mediafire.com/?nymoiqdajmg

Wonderwall - Cat Power
www.mediafire.com/?jtlymzmwmji

use somebody - paramore
www.mediafire.com/?domiteymyzo

milow - ayo technology
www.mediafire.com/?mjtue4mymnm

heartless - the fray
www.mediafire.com/?ucm2tjimdy5

no doubt - its my life
www.mediafire.com/?mzimqzrexyt

alvin and the chipmunks
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=72WYVXT7

anya marina - whatever you like
http://www.mediafire.com/?tei3nm4mdth

and my absolute favorite these couple of days :D

Lily Allen - Naive
www.mediafire.com/?21znthu2g5y

Note: Songs here were posted by other blogs, i take no legal rights for any of them and... most of them are live cover so freely ditrebuted among fans :).

OMG! We R So BFF'S!

2009-12-09T11:39:00.000-08:00

i'm social, i guess, i mean i know many people, i hang out with allot of peeps, i tend to be at the rather cool parties sometimes, which leave the hideous awful ones for most of the time ;), i eat out with friends, chill and smoke up with a few.

but like so many others i tend to choose one group to... stick with, kinda like wolves in a pack... well most likely goats in a herd now that i think about ut!

i tend to believe my... pack!
i have a certian trust when it comes around them, so when my "friends" said baby s. get a Black berry we'd bbm and stay in touch when you're in cairo, omg that would be awesome, you would have to spend much to communicate with us, no need for emails, just zap! and u tell us whats going on and we tell you, OMG OMG OMG! etc... etc...!

terns out... its a loud of crap!
see i found out when you are not in the same region as your fellow goats, the goats dont communicate much with you, they either envy you for what you have or they replace you with a mediocere version of you, who honestly, look worse, talk trash and seriously seriously in need to gain a prospective about them selves, cuase having a beer gut is not sexy at all!

now, what spawned this topic is the fact that i was having drinks with an old friend last weeks, he's a tele-marketer, rather well known in the arab world, not by face but by name, he told me about how he traveled from kuwait to london to study marketing and ideology - something that to this day i can't possibly comprehend! -, and how he felt alone even though he knew about 700 people and he was out all night.

i jumped in and said that it might be because he was single, but he gave me that look, that made me reliese.... i'm single and thats not a reason to feel alone!

he told me that his feeling was because of the fact that the people who he thought we're real companions werent at all for real, explaining further more, he told me that they stayed the same, they got in touch but he found that when worse comes to worst they wouldnt stick up to him, they would just pep talk him, and idea we certainly both agreed on is that... they were not worth it.

a marlboro light later and an espresso got us to the point that real friends are the one who you start your friendship at childhood, school and after college.

and he didnt explain more becuase we had to abrubtly change the subject when his date arrived but i got to thinking...
was it true?

well... yes!

in a way, people who know you from childhood got accostomed to you and undertood your behaviour, people in school were forced to see you everyday, unlike people in college, and after college, work wise and social life wise, no one will be forced to be with you unless they wanted to.

that doesnt mean one has to wait untill after college to bond with someone and become real friends, because many have real friends in the periods we exluded, but it makes sense and it is simply understandable to me.

now i'm not saying that the all friends i have now wont last or whatever, but currently, most of them are not worth my time, i spend my time with 3 people now, and we go along will, having known them for a year now and we dont have much trouble spending time together.

instead of fighting over something we have a healthy argument, which is absolutly nicer than yelling and screeching, maybe its becuase they're well educated and have good self asteam...
maybe!

but i gotta tell ya!
this BFFFF doesnt really appeal to me any more, i like an F, suits me better, and a hella of allot more decent than the b triple double f's!

Sorry

2009-12-09T11:38:00.001-08:00

sorry i havent posted anything my internet crashed, i'mma post now :)

end of hiatus

2009-12-03T18:51:00.000-08:00

each time i wrote, i had one more last thing to write, each time i said a word, i had one more last thing to say.
i had too much built in, i wanted to talk, i wanted to say whats wrong, i wanted to scream and say i was going crazy, i litrally thought i was crazy.
all i wanted is to hurt someone so bad that they'll forget their names and remember mine instead.
i had too much built in...
i tried talking to my friends and all they gave was the "its all going to be ok sweety" with the look of "dramatic much?" in their eyes.

i lost touch with many people, i've stopped being friends with allot of people, i gained the friendship of one or two, but i renewed and revived the friendship of one person, and honestly... it was worth it.

i didnt know how to begin, and i sure didnt know how to end or what to end with...
i lost track of who i am and what i meant to myself.
even when i looked in the mirror, i noticed that i've changed, i started to look worse...
my skin was dry out of life... i looked like a corpse... pale...
my hair got in touch with my depression, my eyes decided to tell everyone about my sleeping habbits and about the joy rides i took, my body numbed by all what that word means, no more come hither...

as the days passed by nothing resonated but the echo of emptyness...
i've reached the point where i've become nothing.

now i'm irrelevant to myself, trying to regain and sustain, hoping to go back and what i was and aim for a better version of myself.
i'm writing again but i dont know concentrate...
i hope you understand, i hope that you're not mad at me for not replying at your emails, i just needed time, and now... i'm going to post again, hoping to regain what ever sense i had, hoping to recognize myself and evolve.

Puase

2009-08-20T03:39:00.000-07:00

this blog is currently on hiatus.

Wicked Intention.

2009-08-17T07:05:00.000-07:00

I honestly envy your T-shirt
It gets to touch your body for hours
Your mirror being always alert
To show the beauty of your colours

The glasses covering your eyes
They got your eyes attention
Your lip gloss for being wise
To brighten my wicked intention

Even the belt you are wearing
It gets to surround your waist
And the music you are hearing
It gets to fill up your taste

Oh darling stay the way you are
I envy every material you're using
Your beauty is such a shiny star
Together with reality it's confusing

Got me captured in your eyes
The garden of flying colours
Of honey bees and butterflies
Among many self-propelled flowers

Oh darling to give you some tips
The truth of my wicked intention
Is to close my eyes kissing your lips
Mixing up the affliction with affection.

By: Vincent Valentine; 10/7/09, 7:35 am.

N word ends porn star career

2009-08-10T04:16:00.000-07:00

Use Of 'N-Word' May End Porn Star's Career

Rudenko - Everybody

2009-08-08T03:54:00.000-07:00

Rudenko - Everybody

Everybody [CD Single]

Silence

2009-08-04T16:59:00.000-07:00

"Silence" is a song by Canadian electronic music group Delerium. The song was co-written by Canadian singer Sarah McLachlan, and she is featured as vocalist on the track. The song is often credited to be one of the best trance songs of all time, still playing in many clubs to this day

this is the DJ Tiesto mix, which is one of my all time favorites, i love this song, its one of my most played on my ipod.

Silence

2/8/1990 - Kuwait Was Burning

2009-08-02T00:47:00.000-07:00

I wrote a very long topic about the iraqi invasion on kuwait...

i think it was over 500 words, i was extremly motivated and moved... it's one of my soft points and i always had negative feelings about this...

but instead of posting it i feel it would be better if i posted a couple of pictures i randomly googled online.

i will post the topic tonight if anyone is intrested in it... but the pictures will speak enough for me...

But now please log on to this website

http://www.freeq8.com/

And

Invasion Of Kuwait
To learn the truth about what happened...

We Might've Forgiven...
But We Haven't Forgotten...

The Beast.

2009-08-01T14:02:00.000-07:00

Who are you in my life?
What are you doing in my room
In my dusty bed...
In my ghastly head
Words in my tongue...
I've never said
Is any of this actually real?
The way you satisfy me...
The way I feel...
The way you admire my manhood
The way you making me feel good
You say I am innocent and pure
Though of that I am not sure
I look at my shadow...

I see a Cerberus with three heads
The first is darkness...
The other is sadness...
And the last is madness
All under the candle's light
You come to me exposed
A feeling I can not fight
Not when the door is closed
Not when we share the same page...
All under the same book
The way you bite your own lip
And the way into my eyes you look
Giving my passion a reason to reborn
A sign for me to ride my unicorn

The personality of a lofty horse
The arrogance of irresistible force
The grasp to the elixir of life
Is when I touch your neck then grip
Pull you then bite your lower lip
Fight the Cerberus then close my eyes
And rise as I make my way inside
To the portal of infernal regions
Where devils hail with no dread to hide
Have you ever reached that point?
Where you can see beyond your sight
Where the light disguise the midnight
To realize the beast inside you is immortal
An avenger to who enter the forbidden portal.

By: Vincent Valentine, 5/6/2009, 12:00pm.

lazy days and me days

2009-08-01T06:56:00.000-07:00

i always had a problem with lazy days, i don't know what to do in them, i like to clean and listen to relaxing music, like feist and nouvelle vague... some norah jones and a couple of shania's, but when i am done cleaning, i simply have nothing to do...
when i go abroad i like a glass of Chardonnay with a great book to humor me for a while, then i take myself out for a nice meal perhaps a movie.

these things i tend to do them alone allot, especially when i know that tomorrow will be a lazy day i turn it into a me day, which consist of bodily maintanance, like hair cuts, nail clipping, shaving, perhaps some light house work... it is a nice time to think alone and to tune/zone out everything else around me!

now, the glitch about lazy dayz and me days, they usually tend to be over protective of me, i mean i can't just invite or allow any one to share a me day, it will be an... us day!

which is kind of weird...
i tried this with a friend, he stayed over for a week in my flat, and on friday, i did the me day routine, he simply followed me and did everything i did, he enjoyed it, i enjoyed sharing it... but honestly, the reason i did enjoy it is because he didnt comment or argue...

i poured my self a glass, he did, i picked up a book, he did, i clipped my nails, he did, i cleaned the dishes, he dried them...
silently....

maybe i could make an exception...
but only if the person is silent...
i mean... if the person started picking on everything i do, it would be so annoying...
i rather do it alone, so... silence is my rule to share those days...

any way, peace out!

Cat Power - Fool

2009-07-27T16:06:00.000-07:00

Why can’t we see our fortunancy
Living as legends have lived.
Bane and dismannered
We coax all the time
Knowing that nothing is left when we die

Come along Fool
A direct hit of the senses you are disconnected
It’s not that it’s bad…it’s not that it’s death
It’s just that it is on the tip of your tongue, and you're so silent

Wanting to live and laugh all the time
Sitting alone with you tea and your crime
Children with kids, and people with parents
Anywhich way there’s no past and no presence
When the day comes and all of them bums
Will reveal enchanting persons
Come along...

When it's a rut and baby's no luck
Half of it's misunderstanding love
The war we have won we're winning again
Within ourselves and within our friends
Come along...

Cat Power - Fool
To Buy You Are Free

old dogs should be put to sleep

2009-07-26T00:29:00.000-07:00

i've dated oldies before, i have a taste for oldies, weither in music or in people... just like wine i beleive the older a person gets the more... wiser (tastier) they become, not that i am a romancer of the elderly, older for me doesn't stricly speak numbers.

to elaborate more, i like older but Preserved :D!you see there are some older people who take quite good care of themselves, they work out, eat healthy, they never smoke nor drink.some older people are healthier than 20 Y.O'S!if we wanna talk numbers, 30 is what classifies as older to me, the mid 20's is slightly older but still it's in my generation, being 20 myself, i am in a gab between to generation, which allows me access to as many feilds as one could desire.

but if we are going to be strict, if we are going to be bold, cruel but of course sexy and delicious on the side ;p, what are the rules to dating older people?when is the limit and where?would it be fair for a hip and trendy lad be hooked up with a boldie oldie?

first the rules:

1- if from far away you look like "mommy/son" "daddy/duaghter" thats a huge no no, it's simply outrageous, and unseemly!

2- if the older person cannot pass the generation gab, that's another no no, you don't want a person who doesnt know who garbage is, or didn't watch friends in a period of their lives.

3- the infant infection: it's when an old dog dresses up like a teen dog and talks about britney spears, or so on... people like this outta be shot, dress/talk your age, be young at spirit and do not use slang that only your kids can use, that will preserve your spot amongst the hot and sexy. - thats a tip for the older players -

4- if the saggs and bags are pleasently starring in the "bodily curves" do not approach, i repeat, DO NOT APPROACH!

5- if the person tend to be parenty, or mommy like, don't you dare get too deep into it, break it off as soon as you could, you already have a mom/dad, you do not need one who also has sex with you, it's sick!

6- useless oldies, i call them dogs who can't smell anymore... if they are not really active in the way you accuire them to, then... whats the point?

now, the limits:so i can't really tell you whats your limit, but i know mine, it's held up by the rules you've read earlier, if we look like mom/son, and if the partner can;t function and can;t get me, then there is no need for us to be together, and it might show from the first date, just be clear about your intentions becuase it's really disrespectful to waste people's time and effort.
but if we really want to talk timing, i suggest that you stop at 15, i mean a 15 year gab should be a conflict, people will recognize the age gab and they might judge and give you a hard time... but on the other hand if i know my blog readers then... "fuck it" should be running through your mind now.
now, if it's fair for the hip and sexy to be with an oldie boldie...

wanna go steady with me?

2009-07-24T05:35:00.000-07:00

i've been dating someone who's rather out of my circle of usual dates, not that its a bad thing, its the tottal opposite, you see, this person i am dating doesnt waant to play the game!
i just kick back and be me, all my flaws are out on the open, so after 4 dates, i was asked to go steady...
when was the last time you heard that?
"wanna go study with me?"
well, i agreed, i mean, no fuss no drama no hard questions...
acceptance of flaws is rare, and concidering the fact that i am emotionally available, why should i say no?
i don't know where this is going, i still i don't know where my feet are, but honestly...
i am worried, i am wierded out and i am seriously out of my element, but i will tell you what happenes later.

Goofing Around ;p

2009-07-23T11:07:00.001-07:00

my pallies and i!

Timaya

2009-07-22T08:48:00.000-07:00

He Has A POINT!

Lily Allen - Chinese [Choir Tribute]

2009-07-20T05:29:00.000-07:00

I teared up when i saw this!
as you know lily is one of my all time favs! this video was suggested to me via youtube suggestion bar, i logged in and i saw it, it's amazing!
here's the video info:

This is our choral tribute to Lily Allen who wrote this song for her mother, Alison Owen.

Orchestrated and Arranged by Rachel Santesso

**We have made our recording as a gift for you. If you'd like to download it for free, you can find it on our homepage: www.capitalchoir.com Enjoy! ***

Video by Alexandra Berglof
Recording engineers: Andrew Dudman and Sam Okell at Abbey Road Studios
studio footage filmed by Nick Marangoni

Madonna - Celebrate [Leaked Remix]

2009-07-19T10:17:00.000-07:00

Maddo Is Back!

hitting the club with a forthcoming Greatest Hits CD, a Celebration is in order!

check out her Awesome Dub 12" remix by the one and only Oakenfold who matters, dont be fooled, it might sound like cheap degitallt mastered audio for the first 10 secs, but give it a listen and it'll be on your most played remixes ipod list!

thanks to the guys who sent me this link, i now can give it to you, but the link will be taken down when i make sure that its know enough and/or when madoona gives me a call and says remove it Byatch!

here's the link...

Celebrate [Oakenfold 12' Dub]

Madonna's Official Page

Enjoy!

and all my anger went away!

2009-07-18T17:48:00.000-07:00

a hand grabbed my lower back to pull me in, hair was touching my face, a smell of lavinder mixed with an old memory just brushed in, a summer breese and a kiss to my neck...
with just that...
all my anger went away!
and all i see is blue skies and clear horrizons!

My Inner Me.

2009-07-18T16:36:00.000-07:00

wait, first I wanna say; Sollai that bad kisser's subject was cool, new, creative, somehow funny, and TRUE!!. nicely done, very exciting.

Ok, My Inner Me;

Listening to the ticking of a clock
Imagining sinister images...
Within my cigarette's smoke

Talking to my inner me
Arguing for hours...
Aiming targets we can not see

Living our blazing past
Ignoring the future...
Though it's striking us fast

Though we have to admit
The time is unstoppable...
Forcing us to submit

And admit its a great folly
To act immortal...
While aging slowly

We know life is not flawless
We uncovered it's outer layer...
And discovered us being clueless

We looked into the globe of sin
And broken the arrow of faith...
Now neither of us is going to win

As we approach the end of continuity
The moment we looked at that globe...
We illuminated our true humanity

As we took the scorpion tail
On our heart we wrote with it...
Justice between us will not prevail

Written clearly by a venom ink
Now I am nearly devastated...
All I do is think, think and think

About my war between evil and good
The one manipulating my mind...
Became a punishment can't be understood

Somehow I always intend to look behind
For memories to dispel my inner me...
Something can stop it from eating my mind

Well eat it and continue to dwell
But the moment I find the promised door...
It will be the moment I shout; farewell.

By: Vincent Valentine; 19/5/2009, 11:10pm.

The stings with lovers: Bad Kissers

2009-07-17T23:49:00.000-07:00

sorry everyone for not being a 100% disher about my thoughts these days, my new job, being the "ultimate single guy" takes all my times, any way, let me tell you something...
you know when the date goes so well, that conversations don't stop and luaghter becomes a star in the show instead of a guest star?
personally, o.k dates happen often, great ones on the other hand are quite a few... so when i have a great date, my mode elevates and i seriously concider more than a peck on the cheeck for a good night kiss :) (6) ;p~

so, at the end of the date, when you're at your dates car or door, you share a deep look and give it a go for a nice sweet kiss, maybe a whory one, depends on the criteria of your date :)

you expect a movie kiss, a hollywood lip lock or even a porno lusty make out session if you are a bit freaky, but as hopeful daters, "we" never expect a bad kiss....
a kiss so horrible that the moment you get in the car or leave the doors step, ur dates nuber is deleted and blocked by Viva's caller scensors.

bad kissers are there, bad kissers do excist, beware!
bad kissers are scary, bad kissers are... bad!!!
there are many types of bad kissers, and i am proud to say that i met a couple of them, here we will demonstrate some of them :D :

the bad breathe kisser: honestly, this could be fixed, once or twice but i will never carry a mint pack for my date, plus even if i do, everytime we kiss i will taste mint... i really like flavours, i mean i cant settle for just ment!
the licker kisser: yes, salivary bath for your teeth and facial area, no good, not really into tongue baths during kissing, tongue baths are enjoyable in other situations but not this one!
the biter and the slicer: the count dracula type, who bites while kisses, dont get me wrong, sexy bites are hot, like a gentle bite on the lip, sometimes a pain inflecting one to release more indorfins, but when blood or brusing is involved... i rather pass!
the salty drier: when your dates lips are salty and dry :), i dont think thats really appealing... is it? i mean some people wouldn't mind, i would, i like sweet lips, i am into sweets, i like sweets!
the diver: when a kiss is so deep, you're like at the bottom of the titanic, you just can't breathe and the pressure is... well smuthering! honestly i would like to breathe, i mean as humans we tend to like breathing... its a requirment for constant vitality... or so i've heard!
the mini-rapers: this is nice sometimes, when your date simply attacks you with deep kissing and nice rough touching, thats hot when your date is hot, but when you're not into your date... thats another story!
the stiffies: i just hate that kind of kissers! it feels as if a wall is kissing you... i mean why would i be kissed by wall? thats not fair? how about some movements!
the mutes: i tend to make a kissing sound, its a vital part of the kiss, but there are many people who do not make a sound, its like ur kissing a mute, or ur in a silent movie where sound is simply science fiction!
the fraction kiss: this not a type of a kisser no, its a bad kiss that i was introduced to a while back, which has the length of 2 fractures of a second... i just hate it, i dont think i need to explain!
the fish kisser: you how a fish moves its mouth? imagine that ur kissing a fish? would that be pleasant? i dont think so, having a still movement with no tricks or stunts is really boring! i rather go home and kiss my own gold fish!
the snake tongue: the horror! its the last kind i can remember, its when your date inserts their tongues into your mouth repeatedly and in a fast paste movement... just like a creepy snake, its annoying.... its bad!

the search of the perfect kisser is hopeless, we all do mistakes, but! we still can hope for improvments!

i did make several mistakes in my dating life, many many mistakes to be honest, bad kissing was a form of those mistakes, but in my defence i did it once or twice when i was uncomfortable!

having a good date is nice, but please dont ruin it with a bad kiss, if there is any unacceptable glitches in a date, bad kissing should be on the top of the deal breaking list!

ps: sorry for all the spelling and grammer mistakes, i wrote this very fast, i am going to tan now :D

and oh, when i say we in a topic... it means me and the voices in my head ;p~ J/K!

I Go to sleep

2009-07-14T20:15:00.000-07:00

Sia - I Go To Sleep
Some People Have Real Problems

Deep, moving and simply human.

Appears - Huanting

2009-07-13T16:52:00.000-07:00

"Appears" is the eleventh single released by Ayumi Hamasaki, the amazingly talented japanese songstress did an amazing job on this son, but with the greatest dj of our time Armin van buuren, a massive smash into your system hits with no mercy, as the beats fuse and take you into places you never knew excisted... Ayu who is major in japan, is also famous for her huanting remixes, this one in perticular will change your thoughts about Armin/Ayu if you ever had disliking thoughts regarding them.

i am posting this because it's huanting me!
and as i am moving on with my life, i usually have my music guiding me, this song is one of the songs that are helping me grow, and realize my true potentials, many things happened, i will tell you about it soon i promise, just give me time to know whats going on with my life...
with love...

"Appears" (Armin van Buuren's Rising Star 12" Mix)
Buy The Single
Buy The Album

Liquid.

2009-07-10T11:08:00.000-07:00

At last I found my refuge
For all the time I was homeless
Confused, injured and hopeless
I found you and loved you...
Into my heart you knew how to sneak
Perfectly used your romantic technique

Easily collected all my tears
Peacefully threw them in the ocean
Where have you been all these years?
When I needed all these true emotion
When I needed to feel that I am alive
With someone teaching me how to survive

In such a careless cruel life...
Filled with sinful creatures
Hidden behind angels features
Where have you been when I was crying?
When I was dying and drying...
I wish there's a word that can express...

All my love to you... my dear
I guess its too much to be written here...
Maybe I will just name it liquid...
Because its so flexible and transparent
It can be strong yet also weak
It can be a tear drop rolling your cheek

It can be water... it can be alcohol
It can reach your heart through your soul
It can spread yet won't seperate...
Because it's the quality of being great
Because you can see it glowing...
Also toward you its flowing...

Because its liquid it can be everywhere...
Maybe a rain drop sliding your hair
Down to your upper lip it will slip
You will taste it and feel my love
You will admire it and ask for more
Melted snow is what you're searching for

Or maybe any similarity to my love...
Something that can truly bright..
That can flies through the light
To your ear it will whisper slowly
A volley of loving words...
The sound of fighting swords

Of tenderness within a windy breeze
Of crashing waves singing their seas
The sound of I love you is what you hear...
Trying to say I want you with me here
Trying to forget that you're so far away
And remember your smile to brighten my day.

By: Vincent Valentine; 23/4/2009, 4:30pm.

Rapping Flight Attendent

2009-06-28T09:07:00.001-07:00

Thats just awesome!
i wanna do that!

WOW Account Cancled!

2009-06-28T08:54:00.000-07:00

...
Just watch, it feels like a pokemon is trying to evolve or a rakoon being trapped in a washing machine!

the circus

2009-06-27T17:57:00.000-07:00

as the three muskateers got fed up/done with finals, they decided to go out and have fun!
well the three muskateers and luke!

with the tune of sex and the city in luke's head, the tune of ghost wisperer in shoug heads and big bang theory in talals, i was left tune-less after i realized that i looked like ten miles of bad road!

somehow i had unruly hair! a weird patch of facial hair and dark circles under my eyes!
what happened?

so i got all pissed and tried to call it off, but apparently, i dont always look like a young marlon brando! - i know there is not similarity but you dont have to be bitchy! -so after the harsh realization, i got myself fixed, and i looked like myslef again.so, long story short!luke drove us to the circus!it was awesome!

we saw the bearded lady, the jugeling boy, the fire breathing triplets, the dork, the tiger trainer and his tigers, but what i really enjoyed, the knife knight!

he is a master in throwing knifes, it is/was fascinating! so, he got his assistant to be crucified - momentarily ofcourse! - and got her spinning, then, he started throwing his knifes, out of no where! WOW!

i was freaked out! - in a good way! -so when he started to ask for one person to volenteer for his hand show, i jumped screaming "anna anna" which means me me!
thats when shoug elbowed me in the stomach!but i kept on shouting!

so, i was picked, 2nd after a slutty 7 year old girl! - she was wearing strabless minni dress -!!!when that whory girl is done, i fluttered -just like a tranny prostitute in new jersy running to her pick up! - or so i've been told by luke, who by the way got elbowed too

!now, the guy instructed me to throw the knife, he got behind me, and helped me throw it..I HIT THE SPOT!

Like OMG right?i havent done anything new in ages!after this i promised myself to do new stuff and to re-new my life, at least to feel alive again!

..(K) luke!!

Mess Interpreted

2009-06-25T10:22:00.000-07:00

long video no need to watch it coz i just woke up and recorded it!

Manel - Leche Leche

2009-06-23T16:10:00.000-07:00

Ps: ... I'm Back Bitchs!!!!

the little angel

2009-06-19T13:28:00.000-07:00

she was just a little girl, she wanted to be a princess, an astronaut, a ballerina, a doctor and most of all she wanted to be a monkey!
she is alive on candy, she really likes candy, parents locked the candy in a cabinet so she would eat her veggies :)
the girl was a star in KG, the lead kid in the musical, the kid was adorable, she had the corckiest laugh, she loved tv, she copied her favorite cartoon characters, she loved to sing and most of all, she was a big fat liar.
the kid got abused, but she never understood it, she used to be beaten up for her little faliures, you know like loosing some money, she listened though, she really was kind hearted, i mean it showed, she was such a good girl, she stole though, candy from the cabinet and from the KG box, she skipped the classes to go to the music room, she really loved music, she wanted to play the piano, but they gave her the drums, so she settled, at least she sat close to it, she really couldn't relate to the other kids, no one realized that, but she did, she was just questioning why she has no friends, but as time went by, she had more things to think about, all she wanted is to impress her parents, she had weird parents, abusive father and emotionally shattered mother with no personality.
the thing with the girl is that she grew up to be a bright student, somehow she wasn't comprehending what she feels, she didn't know she was sad, she kept on asking herself questions that honestly no adult could ever answer.
people wanted their kids to be a splitting image of her, they wished she was theirs, i mean what else would any parent want, smart kid, pretty, polite, i mean she was the trophy kid!
but she stole and lied!
i mean yes she was abused and beaten weekly, sometimes daily, but why did she lie and steal?
no one really knew why, i mean she was fed and clothed, she had a roof over head, why would she lie? why would she steal?
why would she be chicken of other kids?
why would she get a lower grade than a full mark?
she is fed and clothed!
she is fuckin' fed and clothed!!! why isn't she getting full grades?
why is she getting 4/5? why not 5/5?
this kid need to be disciplined!
and so she was... a couple of slaps, a couple of bambo sticks dancing on her spine, she became an A student.
she grew up... had sex in a bathroom.
a public bathroom.
years later, she fell in love, but it didn't quite work out...
any way...
the little angel is now shattered to pieces, last time i saw her she was giving her self to any one who wants to take her home...
the little angel doesnt lie anymore...
the little angel doesnt steal candy anymore...
the little angel is now my best friend, and i am gonna take care of her now, because the little angel just died in my arms...
promising that she will never lie again...
promising to never steal candy again...

Collect Me.

2009-06-11T04:18:00.000-07:00

Don't follow me I think I am lost
Don't ask me where to go...
I am just walking on the coast
With a mind about to blow

Like a miner I dig and drill
My own mind's history...
Searching for answers still
To reveal my hidden mystery

Between the leaves of your tree
I see light breaking through
Trying to set my mind free
Trying to give my mind a clue

What kind of path is mine...
Leading to the city of illusion
Pushing me a cross the line
To the point of so much confusion

Don't get decieved by my look
My pain is internal ignore...
Read my shouts a mysterious book
I shall name it the promised door

Sadly, my shouts isn't strong enough...
To break all the spreading ice
My heart is tired of being tough
Of a destiny based on random dice

Everything around me is so cold
Can you feel my words speaking loud !?
My heart... my mind... I will explode !
Can you hear my whispers within my crowd !?

Of course you can't and will not bother
Of course it's hard to understand my brain
Complicated puzzles, one inside another
Ends with the remaining ashes of my pain

Collect me before I disappear
I am fainting away with the wind
To some where far away from here
So far to the furthest dead end

Collect me before I lose control
Before the sand mixes my remaining ashes
Collect me before I leave my soul
Before I fall seeing all my memory flashes.

By: Vincent Valentine, 13/4/2009, 6:00am.

Realm of Queer.

2009-06-06T02:29:00.000-07:00

I wait, yet what for?
For a complete disappear?
For a promised day?

To devour me more...
Into the realm of queer...
Perhaps I should stay

Or maybe try the realm's door
Why should I fear?
I am ruined anyway...

Perhaps it's time to explore
There must be a reason I am here
Maybe the day is today...

Maybe I am sick of this crowded town
So many moving things, so many people
Hateful gargoyles staring at me down
Built naturally just to enfeeble

Every remaining true sense
Every pool I made by tears
My old passion my true essence
Falling surge of massive fears

Yelling at me... wait no more
Behind your shadow you can't hide
Go in the door of folklore
A twinkle wasp shall be your guide

To the land of beautiful lenience
Rhymed by the murmur of a drone
With the magical melody of silence
I cleave the mist wondering alone

The realm of spectral light
Of flying mushrooms around
Tranquil gist of true bright
Wihin the land of floating ground

I stand on a huge oyster shell
With emerald pearl in the middle
Surrounded by trees with ginger smell
I stand alone enjoying the riddle

The vision of unlimited dream
Of pure natural atmosphere
Surrounded by geyser's warm steam
I venture exploring the realm of queer

A place I can be alone by my own
Ascending to the peak of my mind
No one to argue with, no ringing phone
Hidden in a place you can never find

I got rid of the compass and my map
Just swimming in my dreams non-stop
Enjoying the fantasy of my longest nap
Let me dream, let me never wake up.

By: Vincent Valentine, 26/3/2009, 2:00am.

Mr. Salman ;p

2009-06-05T07:20:00.000-07:00

Faded moon.

2009-06-04T07:47:00.000-07:00

Like an angel fell from the sky
Like a remedy to my broken heart
Snatched me up somewhere high...
Excessive happiness from the start

Perfect shape, amazing style
Phenomenal, gorgeous and adorable
The way you talk the way you smile
It's just so insanely incredible

Yet I knew the wind is coming soon
To dampen this lovely candle...
I knew it's going to be a faded moon
It's just too much for me to handle

You deserve real joy... you really do
I am a ghost... I am simply not real
An easy choice between false or true...
My wounds are too much for you to heal

So since we both know what's up...
And since the beginning is the end
Let's not make this moment a stop...
I'll be glad to have you as a friend.

By Vincent Valentine; 14/3/2009, 5:30 am.

To S.

2009-06-03T15:23:00.000-07:00

my friend shoug called me the other day and i started telling her a few things about whats going on.

the cinversation was long, and she ended it up with "babe, untill you learn to love yourself, you will never know how to love any body else"

Darkness embrace.

2009-05-31T02:52:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time
Where are you hiding?
I miss your hungry touch
I miss you so much
I miss your darkness
It always shines...
Why do you have to hide?
Inside your demonic shrine
You know you're mine
Admit it... do it...

You want to kill my soul?
Here... it's inside
Do whatever you want
I will always be here
I will always be fine
Waiting for every tear
Cry to me, I thirst to drink
Cry more... I want to sink
I love to live it...
When we torture each other

At least we can feel...
Don't you agree?
Or does it bother?
When I force you to kneel
You know the lore...
We lived it together
Torture me, I dazzle you more
Give me yourself...
I give you something real...
It's called love my dear

It's called my biggest fear
When you waste it like that...
When you shout my name
Out of the universe...
When you release your evil voice
To grow the roots of my curse
When you do your lovely things
Delicacy frosting my intense
Ethereal beauty burning my sense
When you crumble between my arms

When you rush me like the blizzard
When you set my heart on hazard
I just miss you so much...
When you bite my ear, whispering
We don't have time to sleep
We have a journey together...
Me and you inside each other
Searching for our souls somewhere deep
Where the devils and angels fight
Where the darkness embrace the light

Where we finally find our souls
Then abandon each other...
Torturing each other, suffering together
Can't you see? blink your eyes...
We're injured by our pain eternity
When we will rest in tranquility?
Can't we just repeat the dream again?
Can't you just vanish my pain?
By looking at my eyes... saying;
I am here... it's me... its reality.

By: Vincent Valentine, 7/3/09, 12:30pm.

Walker of my path.

2009-05-27T13:28:00.000-07:00

Who am I?
Where am I?
Someone justify!
Why my heart is too lost
Why it's suffering the most
Someone tell me why?

Falling to my vanquish
Drowning in my anguish
Tasting my insanity
Fighting against the gravity
Through the magnetic sphere...
I squall out my only wish

To know the answer of my question
Who am I?
Between all the agony near by
And my fragile heart
Between the flashes of your face
And myself falling apart

In your throne of deceive
In your hunger to reave
My inert soul...
Like the black widow
Capture then weave
To throw me in the black hole

Of pain amplify
Faces asking why
Imps brain washing
Harpies heart crashing
Foreign strangers...
Wondering who am I?

I am a walker of my path
Of falling angels
Of burning candles...
Where my brain thinks odd
My heart cries blood
My soul flies to God

Don't you ask me who am I
I don't know anymore
I am the word ignore
I am the so much gore
I am a walker of my path...
Leading me to the promised door.

By: Vincent Valentine; 20/2/2009, 5:20pm.

The End.

2009-05-23T09:52:00.000-07:00

I have to keep walking till the end
I know I am tired and hollowed
I just have to keep walking
Never dare to look behind me...
I know I am being followed